My Story (Reposted)
Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 9:58 pm
I would like to start by saying thank you all for making my two years on here so enjoyable. I really can't recall why I joined this site in March of 2008, but it doesn't really matter at this point, I guess. I had talked with V quite frequently before I joined, and I think he was the one that really convinced me to join here and start posting. I had moderated a small Sum 41 fansite with Charley before I joined here, so when I saw the topic that TNS was looking for a new moderator, I jumped at the chance to help out. I started out doing as much as I possibly could. TNS had some problems in the administrative aspect of the site, and I also did my best to help out there, as well. When I thought that TNS was growing too big for just one global moderator, I suggested that Kyle be made one, and he was. So, that's how I became an administrator here. Now, for anyone interested, I would like to share with you my personal story, and how I've become who I am today.
I came here as a cocky, unhappy person. I was in a very bad time in my life, I was just starting high school and my friends from middle school had kind of deserted me and I really didn't have many friends in my new school. My general attitude towards everything was pretty fucked. I was depressed in real life, and I tried to be an asshole on the internet to make myself feel better. I had absolutely no ability to hold back my anger and it made people around me resent me.
In the Summer of 2008, my life finally started to change for the better. I was on MSN one day when I got a message from someone on PD who I had never really talked to before, but I always knew of. Her name was CourtneyKiara and, to be honest, I always just assumed that she was a bitch because she was tight with the asshole elite members of PD. However, I soon learned that she was one of the most kind human beings I have ever met, and we became very good friends. She had some personal issues that I felt I should help her through, because I didn't think someone as nice as her deserved to be treated the way she was being treated. I don't really know when it happened, but I began to fall in love with this girl. Now, this is just my luck, I finally meet somebody who is perfect for me. The only catch: she lives 3000 miles away.
We began dating, even though we had never met each other, which, even I thought was very strange and fucked up. However, it wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be, we talked all day long every day, she became my best friend and one of the few people I trusted. She and I had to go through many difficult ordeals together, the hardest of which was telling our friends and family about us. Early last Summer, we both finally got the balls to tell our parents the truth, which went over somewhat well. Honestly, my mom was more accepting than I expected her to be.
In August of 2009, after mine and Courtney's first anniversary, I went with two of my friends to one of their girlfriend's Summer houses in upstate New York for a long weekend. Seeing my buddy with his girlfriend being so in love and not even realizing what they had destroyed me, and on the last night I was there I broke down, and I didn't even know why. My friend, Jeff took me aside and talked to me for a few hours and was able to calm me down, but we came to the conclusion that I needed to see Courtney.
When I got home, word got to my best friend, Frank, about what had happened and he, too realized that I needed to see her. Without me knowing, he went to my mom and told her about it and said that I needed to go to California, even if he had to pay for the tickets himself. The next month was my birthday, and my mom called me into her room one day. She said that she waited as long as she could, but she had to show me something. She gave me a receipt for plane tickets to California, and I almost passed out right then and there. I don't think I had ever been happier.
At the end of October, my mom and I boarded a plane for California. The first time we saw each other, I had to try as hard as I could to hold back tears, she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, and it was the happiest moment of my life. We spent every second of those four days together, and I loved every second of it, she was perfect. However, the last day was by far the worst day of my life. We woke up early and spent the morning at my hotel, but eventually I had to go to the airport. My mom and I drove Courtney back to her house, and we had to say goodbye. I stood there holding her for a few minutes, before my mom told me that it was time. I stood there watching as she walked into her house. Watching her walk away from me was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do.
I don't remember much about the trip home, I just remember crying the entire way. When I got home I fell into a terrible depression. It was like I was whole for such a short time, only to be ripped in half again. The problem with having your other half is that when you're alone, you truly aren't you. It's impossible to live without them after you know what it's like to be whole.
If I've taken one thing away from my situation, it would be not to take love for granted. If you find it, make sure you appreciate what you have, and know that there are people like myself that would kill to have what you have.
I have grown so much over the two years that she and I have been together, and I would attribute most of that to her. However, I would also like to thank some other people: Kyle, Charley, Daniel (Bobbyjames), Tom, Jake, V, Nic, Jeremy, Janet, Boni, Madjid, and everyone else who I have become friends with over the years.
I'd also like to thank everyone who actually read this, you have no idea how much it means to me.
For anyone who posted in the last one, if you could respost what you said, that would be nice of you :)
I came here as a cocky, unhappy person. I was in a very bad time in my life, I was just starting high school and my friends from middle school had kind of deserted me and I really didn't have many friends in my new school. My general attitude towards everything was pretty fucked. I was depressed in real life, and I tried to be an asshole on the internet to make myself feel better. I had absolutely no ability to hold back my anger and it made people around me resent me.
In the Summer of 2008, my life finally started to change for the better. I was on MSN one day when I got a message from someone on PD who I had never really talked to before, but I always knew of. Her name was CourtneyKiara and, to be honest, I always just assumed that she was a bitch because she was tight with the asshole elite members of PD. However, I soon learned that she was one of the most kind human beings I have ever met, and we became very good friends. She had some personal issues that I felt I should help her through, because I didn't think someone as nice as her deserved to be treated the way she was being treated. I don't really know when it happened, but I began to fall in love with this girl. Now, this is just my luck, I finally meet somebody who is perfect for me. The only catch: she lives 3000 miles away.
We began dating, even though we had never met each other, which, even I thought was very strange and fucked up. However, it wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be, we talked all day long every day, she became my best friend and one of the few people I trusted. She and I had to go through many difficult ordeals together, the hardest of which was telling our friends and family about us. Early last Summer, we both finally got the balls to tell our parents the truth, which went over somewhat well. Honestly, my mom was more accepting than I expected her to be.
In August of 2009, after mine and Courtney's first anniversary, I went with two of my friends to one of their girlfriend's Summer houses in upstate New York for a long weekend. Seeing my buddy with his girlfriend being so in love and not even realizing what they had destroyed me, and on the last night I was there I broke down, and I didn't even know why. My friend, Jeff took me aside and talked to me for a few hours and was able to calm me down, but we came to the conclusion that I needed to see Courtney.
When I got home, word got to my best friend, Frank, about what had happened and he, too realized that I needed to see her. Without me knowing, he went to my mom and told her about it and said that I needed to go to California, even if he had to pay for the tickets himself. The next month was my birthday, and my mom called me into her room one day. She said that she waited as long as she could, but she had to show me something. She gave me a receipt for plane tickets to California, and I almost passed out right then and there. I don't think I had ever been happier.
At the end of October, my mom and I boarded a plane for California. The first time we saw each other, I had to try as hard as I could to hold back tears, she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, and it was the happiest moment of my life. We spent every second of those four days together, and I loved every second of it, she was perfect. However, the last day was by far the worst day of my life. We woke up early and spent the morning at my hotel, but eventually I had to go to the airport. My mom and I drove Courtney back to her house, and we had to say goodbye. I stood there holding her for a few minutes, before my mom told me that it was time. I stood there watching as she walked into her house. Watching her walk away from me was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do.
I don't remember much about the trip home, I just remember crying the entire way. When I got home I fell into a terrible depression. It was like I was whole for such a short time, only to be ripped in half again. The problem with having your other half is that when you're alone, you truly aren't you. It's impossible to live without them after you know what it's like to be whole.
If I've taken one thing away from my situation, it would be not to take love for granted. If you find it, make sure you appreciate what you have, and know that there are people like myself that would kill to have what you have.
I have grown so much over the two years that she and I have been together, and I would attribute most of that to her. However, I would also like to thank some other people: Kyle, Charley, Daniel (Bobbyjames), Tom, Jake, V, Nic, Jeremy, Janet, Boni, Madjid, and everyone else who I have become friends with over the years.
I'd also like to thank everyone who actually read this, you have no idea how much it means to me.
For anyone who posted in the last one, if you could respost what you said, that would be nice of you :)
