Family = My tormentors

Elise41 · Post by **Elise41** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 2:41 am

Alright I need to fucking get this off my chest.

My father and mother have been after me for so long about how I run my life but honestly, it's not their choice it's mine and it seems that they can't accept that. Man, where do I start!

After getting accepted to McGill university I realised that school will cost A LOT more than college did and despite the fact that I might have been able to save a couple thousand by working, I would be broke by the time I paid my tuition, books, rent, food, drugs, etc. I was stressed to the max and I know exactly what my options are but because of the lack of the social life that I had from my last two summers, I decided to take this summer off. I want to be able to go out which I haven't been able to do in the last three years of college much. I'm not someone who spoils myself much so I seriously need this.

I had insured my financial situation by applying to loans and bursuries and am getting over 700$ a month once school starts. I get more on months where I have to pay tuition and books. I'm able to survive on it perfectly and have more than enough money in the bank to last me the summer.

Unfortunately my parents have not taken too well to this. They have been down my back bitching at me because I am not working at the moment and because of my decision to continue school. They helped me throughout school by paying my rent when I went to Vanier and claim that "because they had been supporting me financially and thought that I would be working by now that I have not been fair to them because it's was our agreement." They also claim that applying for loans and bursuries is a bad idea because I'll be in "debt." NO DUH! Most students finish school in debt after university!!

They will not leave me alone until I get a job and I took the summer off because for once I wanted a real vacation! For the last two summers I was working overtime and living at my parents which proved to be a bad experience for me because of their attitude towards my life. They can't accept my decisions and it's driving me insane! They have been treating me like this for my whole life fuck. I have even tried losing all contact with them.

What do I do?!!

UnderclassHeroine · Post by **UnderclassHeroine** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 3:07 am

I would get advice but I'm having family issues too, so I really don't know what to do./

benroy39 · Post by **benroy39** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 4:18 am

it seems that you already made your decision. go to school and also have fun during your summer, but what i would do is get ONE part time job, someplace that intrests you so that you have something small to fall back on. but other than that, your set in my opinion. if this is your third year of university, im guessing you are about 20, and legally you are an adult, and legally, allowed to make your own decisions without your parents say.

Elise41 · Post by **Elise41** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 4:45 am

It's my first year in uni because I graduated from a three year program in college. We graduate at grade 11 in Quebec and can start college at like 17 so I'm 20 now.

Yeah I'm getting a part time job during school. I know that my parents can no longer influence my decision it's just hard to avoid the topic and I wish that I could. I would rather want more help with that lol. :P

Lithium · Post by **Lithium** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 5:23 am

Well I recomend you to tell your parents to have a seriously talk about it all our parents always are bitching us cause they are super protective.

So relax get vacations real vacations make understand your parents you are ok.

Tiny *[Banned]* · Post by Tiny *[Banned]* » Wed Jul 18, 2007 5:36 am

Lithium wrote:Well I recomend you to tell your parents to have a seriously talk about it all our parents always are bitching us cause they are super protective.

So relax get vacations real vacations make understand your parents you are ok.

Rick · Post by **Rick** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 5:40 am

move out (if you haven't already)

you've got to get on with your own life sometime, and after uni, you should be home free (literally) of course you're gonna have debts but thats why your in uni, to get a kick ass job to pay off those debts. hopefully your parents will understand, they might need to let go.

Tiny *[Banned]* · Post by Tiny *[Banned]* » Wed Jul 18, 2007 5:40 am

Yeah.

charle22 · Post by **charle22** » Wed Jul 18, 2007 5:44 am

well sit down and talk with your parents (although im sure you already have, since this has been going on for a while)

and well, in my opinion your doing a good job running your life
and your parents should realise that

just put alotta effort and work hard with what you do (school, work etc)
sorry if thats kinda basic shit, but its all i got...lol

heartcore-prisoners · Post by **heartcore-prisoners** » Fri Jul 27, 2007 4:45 am

okay. you want to hang out? well. apply for at least TWO jobs that will interest you. (working at a modern fashion clothing store such as West49 (im not sure if you have it wherever yu live, cuz i live in canada) cuz thr are a lot of cool people that are in your exact situation. i dont mean to be rash, but get a job(s) to save your ass. but what the hell do i kno rite? im only 13. =] seriously, i really am 13.

oh yeah. one more thing. the parents. yur old enuff rite? yur going to uni.? so yur at least 19 am i rite? yu can feed yourself, so tell your parents to BACK OFF, you are old and matured enuff to manage yourself, ESPECIALLY if you are makign your OWN (self worked) money. (only applies if you live on your own pal. if you still live wiff yur parents.. then that doesnt exactly work).

Zam · Post by **Zam** » Fri Jul 27, 2007 6:22 pm

Tell them it's your life. You're old enough to live your life, whatever way you want.

Janet · Post by **Janet** » Fri Aug 10, 2007 2:59 am

they think they're doing what's best for you and they don't stand the fact that you're perfectly handeling your life. I shouted out of anger to my mom that im not her hand or leg that she has to control all the time. Didn't face the fact that im an individual too.

funkymunky2404 · Post by **funkymunky2404** » Fri Aug 10, 2007 11:10 am

Seriously discuss it with them and tell them you really need this. Tell them the stress of school and work and everything has got too much and you simply need to take a break and take a step back from all the shit going on.

Tell them thay they won't run your life forever and you need to start making independent decisions of your own, which will greatly help you later on in life.

If needs be, tell them you will leave home and make your own decisions cuz either way you are going to do this alone. Then you can do what rick said.

Just seriously have a talk with them and prove to them you are grown up now and can handle yourself and can't be sugar-coated your whole life. :)

Ian · Post by **Ian** » Fri Aug 10, 2007 8:17 pm

tbh wht i see is parents jus worried that ull get into money problems..believe me ikno i been in debt with banks twice in less than a year.. but yea have a word with the mum n dad n sort out things they jus worried about u i tink